The Lie of “Supposed To”

Like many others in their late twenties, I’ve caught myself believing the lie of “supposed to.”

Saying things to myself like “I’m supposed to have (blank) by this time in my life.”  

A certain amount of money.  A house.  A wife.  A steadily advancing job.  A certain level of maturity.  Character qualities I should’ve had by now.  

Its a lie.  There is no ‘supposed to.’  Our idea of what we’re ‘supposed to be’ by this time in our lives is a socially conditioned way of ascribing worth and identity to ourselves in comparison with other people.  The only reason we think that we’re ‘supposed to’ have accomplished anything by this time in our life is because we’re looking around at other people.  

God places us uniquely where we are.  He has set you on a unique trajectory for your life in which, if you continue to cultivate a heart that is attentive to his leading, will prove to produce something unimaginably beautiful from your life.  

I’ve realized that in my life, it is only outside of all the ‘supposed tos’ I’ve constructed for myself that I find out the great truth that I may not be where I thought I was supposed to be, but I am right where I need to be.  

Be fully present in life’s disappointments and you will often later find them to be God’s greatest appointments with you.  

The life we feel we’re missing out on is almost always available right under our noses. 


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